How time flies! I've been on WPT Poker mag for about 6 months now and I'm really enjoying the change of scenery. I'm getting to meet some of the worlds top players (Antonio Esfandiari, Vicky Coren, Tony G, and Dave 'Devilfish' Ulliot amongst others) and now all I need is for someone to invite me out to Las Vegas to do an important photoshoot. I was a complete novice at Poker before I joined the team and I still am. I'm giving it a go though and just about holding my own. I'll let you know if I ever start winning any serious money.
One for all the Victor Meldrews in the land: Channel 4 just ran a show entitled "Who's digging up our roads?". It was full of holes, the type that beleague every street in every town. Its an outrage that these contractors employed to dig up the roads just end up costing us millions by time wasting. Here, look at me shaking my fist at you... *shakes*
I was most amused when they showed one guy who set up a website cataloguing every hazard in his district. That'll be me in a few years - just you wait and see.
I was most amused when they showed one guy who set up a website cataloguing every hazard in his district. That'll be me in a few years - just you wait and see.
Let's all pause for a moment and lament the passing of our beloved VW Passat. The timing belt went, smashing all the cylinder heads in the engine. Gone for recycling but never forgotten. We now have a Saxo - the gods are truly stamping on me.
These days you can't even enjoy the sun in your own backyard without the whole world knowing. Dutch TV couldn't resist trying to track down the unfortunate sun worshipper.
Smashing
Some cheeky twunt had a go at lifting my nano the other day as I left work. Luckily I reacted quick enough to clamp my arms to my chest trapping the ipod in my jacket. However I don't think it was a serious attempt - the geezer was drunk and trying his hand at making me rise to his bait. I think he just wanted to have some agro. Luckily I spotted his empty bottle of ASBO juice and decided that giving him the evils was exactly what he wanted, so I turned and walked away.
What a pile of bollards that feature is. iTunes "Just for You" tries to predict the tunes you're most likely to be interested in. Apparently I like Natasha Bedingfield and Charlotte Church. How far from the truth could it be? No wonder it's still in beta.
A guy called Amir thought it a good idea to sell a broken laptop on ebay without telling the buyer it was not working. The unfortunate victim, "laptopguy", decided to create a spoof blog of Amir. Laptopguy had managed to removed the harddrive from the bust PC and got it to work. The blog shows all of the dodgy things that Amir had kept on it. All in all you can safely say that Amir has had his comeuppance - I hope he gets plenty of flak for it.
Gambler's paradise is getting closer with the publication of this list: 'Super-casino' shortlist set out. Beyond the mega casinos that are being planned, smaller venues are on the cards. My city, Bath, is in the running for a casino licence. This is being mooted as a tourist attraction. I'll reserve judgement, but the word is that the local casino won't have a large fruit machine presence and will be more likely to stage poker tables. Which means that its likely I'll have a ready made poker location for photoshoots right on my doorstep. I have to explain that I work on World Poker Tour magazine.
Looney story of the week comes from the Beeb: Woman allowed to sunbathe naked. Lynett, it seems, has taken a liking to sunbathing in the altogether. Fair enough. However the neighbour, upon spying the bountiful display, decided to video the scene as he found it deeply offensive. The story doesn't tell us if he actually challenged her at the time. "Oy, put some clothes on!", would have surely ended the matter rather than having to end up in court (and therefore in the full media glare). To me it's the neighbours eagerness to reach for the camcorder that's more disturbing than the actual offence. I feel that Mr Jones really needs to get a life. I'm sure it won't have done the prosecutors reputation much good to have brought this case to the court.
My wallet is getting a serious battering since I moved into my new home. Recently I've bought a circular saw, an electric tile cutter, a cordless hedge trimmer, a fork and a shovel. My wife managed to break the fork with her first attempt at digging the garden. Good job its got a 25 year guarantee - the sign of a kwality product. The hedge trimmer is good fun though. I'm now a fully qualified suburban dad. Rumours of me taking up pipe smoking in the garden shed are grossly exaggerated.
When someone decides to point a loaded gun at you during a photoshoot do you run or do you laugh hysterically at this prank and cajole the "model" to pose just one more time? Luckily I had just been fortunate enough to pull the curtains off their window, which set them up in a lovely mood for modelling.
I've been to Hull three times in my life. Each time I've left there saying "Never again!". In Hull Monday nights do not exist and the only place open serving food is Pizza Hut. I spent the night there this week on a photoshoot. The hotel I stayed at was adequate but the room I was in overlooked the rail station platforms - "Bing Bong" at the break of dawn.
It makes Norwich look like a fun place to go.
It makes Norwich look like a fun place to go.
Needless to say the new gas cooker we had installed today is faulty. Only half of the rings spark to ignite the gas. Cue more servicemen traipsing through our home, to stand around scratching their arses, and tutting at the previous servicemans work.
Why is it that all household appliances decide to break all at the same time. I'm currently out of pocket for a new gas cooker, DVD player, and my phone looks like its about to crash and burn. My wallet has had more of an airing recently than Paris Hiltons booty. That's one item I wouldn't get my wallet out for. Bleugh!
Anyway why is it that when things break its just cheaper to go out and buy a new one than to get it repaired. My Dad was a TV repairman so he took a look at my old DVD player. He couldn't find the problem but just said "If I had a manual for this I could fix it but the cost of the replacement parts wouldn't make it worth it". Hurrah for technology!
Anyway why is it that when things break its just cheaper to go out and buy a new one than to get it repaired. My Dad was a TV repairman so he took a look at my old DVD player. He couldn't find the problem but just said "If I had a manual for this I could fix it but the cost of the replacement parts wouldn't make it worth it". Hurrah for technology!
Hey, it's been a while but the house and my job have taken up much of my time. I eventually fitted the radiator and now have a fully working central heating system. Well, when I say "I" read "uncle"! My relatives came for a visit week before last and my uncle fitted it, whilst I was stuck at work, as a surprise. Top man.
We had had a go at installing it the day before (when I was off) but got stumped by the inadequate wall screws the manufacturers supplied with it. Grahame, my uncle, bought some proper heavy duty cavity wall screws that did the job.
That's a job to strike off the list. So now I've only got about seven gazillion other things DIY left to do.
We had had a go at installing it the day before (when I was off) but got stumped by the inadequate wall screws the manufacturers supplied with it. Grahame, my uncle, bought some proper heavy duty cavity wall screws that did the job.
That's a job to strike off the list. So now I've only got about seven gazillion other things DIY left to do.
Hmm. After receiving news that my replacement radiator would arrive in mid-march I ended up having to sit and wait. Not exactly good customer service but things in my life were getting very busy so I reluctantly let me ire slip.
Then I received some good news out of the blue. They called me up to say that they would be delivering the replacement on the 11th. Of February.
I had to yet again ask them to make sure they meant this Saturday. They said that that was correct. So today was the day they were meant to come and they said it would be between 12pm and 4pm.
I went up to the house (where they were delivering it) about 10am and did a few jobs, taking stuff to the skip. I had just finished loading up my second car load and about to jump in to start off, when I heard the lorry pull up.
"Sorry guv, we've 'ad a few cancellations so we're a bit early." said the driver.
Oh well, can't complain. Well not until at least I've fitted the radiator!
Wish me luck.
Then I received some good news out of the blue. They called me up to say that they would be delivering the replacement on the 11th. Of February.
I had to yet again ask them to make sure they meant this Saturday. They said that that was correct. So today was the day they were meant to come and they said it would be between 12pm and 4pm.
I went up to the house (where they were delivering it) about 10am and did a few jobs, taking stuff to the skip. I had just finished loading up my second car load and about to jump in to start off, when I heard the lorry pull up.
"Sorry guv, we've 'ad a few cancellations so we're a bit early." said the driver.
Oh well, can't complain. Well not until at least I've fitted the radiator!
Wish me luck.
*flexes fingers* Right, now we've got the setting up of this blog out of the way, lets get down to business...
Home deliveries - why are they such a pain in the proverbial? Order something online, read the t&c's, note the ecommerce trust badges, hit the checkout. Cool. Ah, but then the real world kicks in. Is it actually in stock? Maybe. Is the delivery to be made at a reasonable time? Possibly. Do you actually get the product ordered? Usually. What happens when these actualities actually fail - you end up on hold on the line of infinite Celine Dion loopy tunes waiting for the "next available operator" to deign to answer your query from their comfortable dungeon of a call centre.
"My radiator that I ordered from you has got a hole in it"
"Your order number please sir?"
"umm, 596464xxxx"
"Sorry sir, that should start with a 1"
*re-examines printout*
"No, it quite clearly starts with a five"
"That's not possible sir..."
*bile rises at the thought that my eyes are in fact damned liars*
"Could you put me through to someone who can make it possible...?"
So he tells me eventually that a replacement would be sent to me the next day. After picking myself up off the floor and asking him to verify this, I start to think that maybe he's not so bad after all.
"The delivery will be with you between 8am and 1pm"
Cue me spending an entire day (the next day) waiting for said delivery. Come 2pm I get on the blower and ask what's happened.
"Sorry sir but we need to assess the fault with the product first"
"But the operator assured me it would be here today"
"I'm sorry but there is nothing on the system to indicate this. You'll get a call within 48 hrs about it and then we will arrange a new delivery time"
This is a somewhat foreshortened transcription of the call, but you get the message.
Now as I type this it is beyond 48 hrs since I logged the call and at least 96 hrs since the fault was first raised with them (my wife made the first attempt!).
Excuse me while I go off and kick something...
Home deliveries - why are they such a pain in the proverbial? Order something online, read the t&c's, note the ecommerce trust badges, hit the checkout. Cool. Ah, but then the real world kicks in. Is it actually in stock? Maybe. Is the delivery to be made at a reasonable time? Possibly. Do you actually get the product ordered? Usually. What happens when these actualities actually fail - you end up on hold on the line of infinite Celine Dion loopy tunes waiting for the "next available operator" to deign to answer your query from their comfortable dungeon of a call centre.
"My radiator that I ordered from you has got a hole in it"
"Your order number please sir?"
"umm, 596464xxxx"
"Sorry sir, that should start with a 1"
*re-examines printout*
"No, it quite clearly starts with a five"
"That's not possible sir..."
*bile rises at the thought that my eyes are in fact damned liars*
"Could you put me through to someone who can make it possible...?"
So he tells me eventually that a replacement would be sent to me the next day. After picking myself up off the floor and asking him to verify this, I start to think that maybe he's not so bad after all.
"The delivery will be with you between 8am and 1pm"
Cue me spending an entire day (the next day) waiting for said delivery. Come 2pm I get on the blower and ask what's happened.
"Sorry sir but we need to assess the fault with the product first"
"But the operator assured me it would be here today"
"I'm sorry but there is nothing on the system to indicate this. You'll get a call within 48 hrs about it and then we will arrange a new delivery time"
This is a somewhat foreshortened transcription of the call, but you get the message.
Now as I type this it is beyond 48 hrs since I logged the call and at least 96 hrs since the fault was first raised with them (my wife made the first attempt!).
Excuse me while I go off and kick something...
As ever the first post of a blog tends to be a pile of piffle intended to test the workings of said blog. Any success?
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